A bad breakup…

breaks you.

It shatters you from places that you didn’t even know existed in you. It overwhelms you. It twists your idea of what’s normal – because , suddenly, nothing is going to be the same anymore. You won’t get those texts that used to place a smile on your face every morning; you won’t go to those places where you used to sit down for hours and just….be yourselves together. The midnight calls, the roses, the makeups after little arguments – NOTHING.

Your ears will ring with a strange silence every minute of every hour of every day while the rest of the world around you goes on. Normally.

A breakup does all those things to you.

But a bad one does them more awfully, somehow.

My dear reader friends who are a frequent at my blog – I feel like, based on the content I read and write about, you know how someone like me – so obviously passionate and excited about everything – would have reacted to something so negative, so hurtful. So….so…disruptive.

Yes. I freaked the fuck out. Not because someone who had been in my life for so long a time was about to leave – juust like that. But because he was going to do so by igniting feelings that I have had the fortune of not being that familiar with.

Resentment.

Hate.

and anger at my own lack of judgement.

I feel like I used to live in my own little world – imagining things BETTER than they actually were. Forgiving when strict action was needed, and NOT walking out when I had the chance to do that with a less messy aftermath.

Well. Now that it’s been a few months since that, things are starting to fall into place. A little bit at least.

I am back to doing things I love and writing is one of them. Would you believe me if I told you that I haven’t written a single word, ever since that last post I made? I felt like that flow of creativity and inspiration withered away as the stream of happiness stopped in it’s tracks and moved away from my heart.

*sigh*

I…..don’t know what else to say. I just had to pour it all out. Document the moment I decided to release every single fragment of negativity from within me and just…let it all go.

So…now you know why I have been so inactive lately. Both here AND everywhere else. Just getting back to normal, with high hopes of the new normal to be much more fun and positive AND loyal than the previous one.

Planning on dropping by your feed sooner than you’d expect.

Lots of love.

RAIN


NOTE: I…umm…I seem to have gotten lots of comments while I was away and some of them are from last year. SO…don’t be surprised if you get replies from me on those. It’ll be super awkward to reply to them now but I’ll feel worse if I DON’T so…bear with me, please! ❤

28 thoughts on “A bad breakup…

    1. Thank you so much for your comment Leyre. I appreciate you taking the time! ❤
      It really is hard and getting over something like that does take time but I am glad that things are finally getting back to normal. ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Sending love Rain. Be gentle with yourself. The blogging community will always be here for you as I’ve found out as I’ve barely been managing to keep my head above water with it. And yet whenever I do engage with people I’m welcomed back as if no time has passed. 😊💛💜💖

    Liked by 1 person

    1. THANK YOU SO MUCH, Em! Your comment means a lot and they always cheer me up! ❤ ❤ 🙂
      YESS!! The blogging community always makes you feel so welcomed – that's one of the reasons why it's so hard to keep away from it for long! ❤ ❤ 🙂 🙂

      Like

  2. I’m sorry to hear about your troubles, but on the other hand your return to this community looks like you’re turning a new page and finding your energy and drive again, so I’m certain that from now on things will only get better. Welcome back! **big hug** 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Mads. YES! Lately, I had been feeling so unproductive, so…so..disconnected from everything I love and I finally put my foot down. It was time to move on. For real. And interacting with you guys again, sharing my love of reading and books with you is what I was missing I guess! ❤ 🙂

      I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOUR COMMENT. It means A LOT! ❤ ❤

      ALSO….what are you reading these days?!?!! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry to hear about this; that kind of pain is on its own level. I’m glad you’re coming out of all that by now, and I wish you continued growth and happiness in the days to come. Always glad to see you in my reader again, & I can’t wait to see you more in all your creative spaces again ❤ xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your support, Macey! Yeah, it was difficult – especially in the beginning – but now I feel much better and slowly been coming out of that mist of confusion and helplessness!

      Thank you so muchhh, hon! Your comment means a lot! ❤ 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s great to have you back, Rain!! And don’t ever feel bad about taking time off for yourself when you need it! Break-ups are almost always tough and leave you reeling, so I’m glad you took some time for yourself, and very sad you had to go through all that! 😥❤❤ I hope things are looking better now, and I’m sending you lots of love!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ahhh, I’m so sorry to hear about this, Rain. I have gone through one in my life too and what helped me the most is to talk to people who care about me. Just being able to communicate your thoughts, your feelings, anything, to someone who is ready to listen to you, to give you their thoughts on the matter, and whatnot will allow you to reflect on everything that happened but also everything that you should now look forward to. Moving forward won’t mean to forget what you went through but to learn from it all and make the most of your life with all the pieces you got. You are more than anything you think broken. 😉 Hope you slowly get back to your groove, Rain. This community will likely never give up on you and you’re always welcome here too! 😉 Stay safe!

    Like

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